Life and other annoyances.
Without the Interference of Ticketmaster and a recent online survey, I would never have known that people find the use of mobile phones by patrons, the least acceptable aspect of visiting the Theatre. Does that even count as ‘research’? Surely it’s just stating the obvious isn’t it? Like telling a professional darts player he’s carrying …
It’s official; our children are not getting adequate careers advice. Well, not my children, I don’t actually have any, but that’s beside the point. According to the independent children’s, regulatory service Ofsted, our children (not mine) aren’t receiving careers advice from skilled sources at their respective schools. Those that had alternatively bought in careers advice …
Imagine the scene if you will. Your Aunt Brenda is over from New Zealand for a couple of weeks. You’ve been secretly dreading her arrival and are even less thrilled about her extended stay. Sure, she has a good heart but it’s hard to overlook her constant criticisms of your appearance/current employment/musical tastes etc. They …
Continue reading "Your Father sells DVDs in HELLLLLL!!!!!!!!!"
Happy Misery Day! Today is the day that you can legally punch dogs in the face, use the C word at school children, and call your own mother a slag! Feel that the cab driver that brought you home took the long way round, just to milk more money from your ever-dwindling wallet supply? Spit …
Continue reading "The one where i appear to be the only cheerful person in town. Non-fiction."
Ever since I was knee high to a paedophile I'd fantasized about having a super power. Maybe it would be nice to jump really high I thought, or fly into space and go supersonic, or defecate curly wurly's at will (I had a troubled upbringing) I'd spend literally hours, gazing off into the distance, imagining …
In honour of Starbuck’s announcement that it has asked it’s customers in the U.S to stop bringing guns into it’s outlets, I have compiled a list of other things that ‘should not be part of the Starbuck’s experience’. 1.Masturbating 2.Women breastfeeding................ ...........cats. 3.The cast of Glee 4.Gary Glitter 5.Any projectiles being shot from an orifice. …
What does it actually mean to be a man these days? I’m somewhat confused as to what it takes in this modern world to cement my place in the testosterone filled halls of man-dom. I took my search to the world wise web, in search of answers and enlightenment, but was left feeling more confused …
Continue reading "To Be the Man you have to fondle cats, apparently."
A month into writing this blog and the old grey matter is failing me. What on earth can I write about? Maybe a piece about the horrors of that performance at the VMA’s by that complete twerk Miley Cyrus? Probably not, It’s old news now and to be honest if I have to look at …
Miserable Musing. 